Oddly, the biggest challenge to collaborative intimacy stems from defenses against the benefit of prolonged and increasing connection. The team crises that arise from this resistance occur early and persist indefinitely. When your emotions erupt, with neither clear intention nor mature self-observation, they function much like a baby’s cry. You demand attention, but, unlike a baby, you lack the legitimacy conferred by the baby’s utter dependency on others.
When your way of dealing with emotions disrupts team progress, then you are (at least) in a bad relationship with your feelings. The problem of “excessive” or bursty emotionality does not lie in the abundance or the richness of the feelings, but in their everyday denial.
From “Software for your Head”
by Jim and Michele McCarthy
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